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Kindness, compassion, and patience are wonderful traits that keep harmony among everybody, right?
However, have you ever noticed how we seek to give them to people but least apply them to ourselves?
Instead of kindness, we criticize ourselves. Rather than patience, we grow mad at our slow progress.
We’re even embarrassed by our own talents, so we keep them in the shadows, far from people’s judging eyes.
If you relate to this, it’s time to care for yourself and be kinder. If you would cheer for other people, why not cheer for yourself, too?
In this post, let’s talk about 12 ways we can be kinder to ourselves.
Ready? Here we go!
12 Ways You Can Be Kinder To Yourself
1. Perfection? Let it go.
The problem with perfectionism is it soon develops into a heightened sense of self-consciousness.
We don’t easily accept criticisms for fear of making a fool of ourselves. The result? We stop trying new experiences with the fear of mediocrity and negative opinions.
It’s one rampant issue that strains us emotionally and mentally. Personally, this fear sends shivers to my spine.
Thankfully, there’s one solution I found out to combat perfectionism.
It’s humility.
When we’re humble, we stop putting ourselves and our achievements on a pedestal. Instead, we acknowledge our limitations and remain open to learning and growth.
When we’re humble, we no longer worry about the false self-image, encouraging us to explore new opportunities without reservation.
We worry less, because deep down, we’ve realized that progress is better than perfection.
Do not batter yourself for not making perfect outputs at first try. Rather, celebrate because you’ve taken a step forward.
2. Time alone to self-reflect
Even if you love noise and crowds, a study shows that continuous exposure to noise pollution can have detrimental effects on mental and even cardiovascular health.
That said, schedule a time to unplug. Carve out moments to disconnect from the urban clamor and the chaos of online activity.
Take intentional breaks from toxicity. Seek a quiet, serene nature. If you can’t take time off to nature, simply retreating to a quiet space at home would be a good while, too.
One hobby of mine is daydreaming and journaling. I unplug from the loud screams of social media, and I redirect my focus inward, prompting introspection with questions like:
- How can I reach my goals?
- How do I grow in skill?
- What do I want in life?
- Who am I?
- What’s my purpose in life?
When we have intimate self-talk, we create a more secure and grounded version of ourselves that isn’t swayed by the whims and fads of society.
This inner connection cultivates a unique sense of peace within ourselves.
3. Eat healthier
Numerous studies have shown the impact of diet on both physical and mental well-being.
For example, a high intake of sugar can actually induce more anxiety, and people who eat more fruits experience a more positive mood.
I personally revamped my diet into a healthier one, opting for protein-rich and fiber-packed whole foods like brown rice, vegetables, and fruits.
I lessened sugar consumption, eliminated soda and store-bought juices, and focused on cooking my own meals.
As I lessened consuming sugar, my food craving miraculously stopped overall. I think about food lesser and lesser and I’m amazingly more energetic.
If we want to be kinder to ourselves, be aware of the foods we consume. Pay attention to the signals and nurture our bodies accordingly.
4. Don’t keep a record of your failures
It’s such an undeniable habit, especially for sentimental and nostalgic people (like me!). We have a habit of reminiscing everything – even the past mistakes – and struggle to forgive ourselves.
But truly, if you’re the type to count your errors and make a tally of misfortunes, you’re doing yourself a disservice. You’re trying to punish your present self for the mistakes of the past.
We get prolonged torment by the memories that we won’t ever change, which disrupts our decisions in the present and our ability to fix our future.
Be kinder to yourself. Forgive the mishaps that you did, and forgive other people who have hurt you. Let the pain and resentment dissolve as time heals you gradually.
Healing doesn’t have to be instant. It’s slow progress, but as long as your heart is willing, you’ll be free from the shackles of your painful past.
Related post: 13 Valuable Tips To Become A Better Version of Yourself
5. Be authentic
Conformity is easy for some. But if you’re someone who has a strong sense of self, know that there’s nothing wrong in pursuing what you truly want in life, especially if it’s your calling.
Being authentic is understanding your true values and aligning your life with them instead of trying to impress the people around you.
It’s embracing what you have, cultivating it to your advantage, and understanding how you can grow yourself and contribute to the world as yourself.
It’s not abandoning your skills and gifts but instead nurturing them to live up to your most potential.
See, I’ve always been an obedient kid who follows my parents’ and mentors’ instructions. However, as I experienced life, I realized that I didn’t fit into the conventional corporate mold.
So, what I did was hone my skills despite the lack of support from my family.
I pursued writing and here I am, six years doing my job and still enjoy it. My hope is to continue honing my skills and using them to make a meaningful difference in people’s lives.
When we pin down our true strengths, we’ll be directed to our own purpose.
6. Grow in wisdom
We’re in the information age now, and people are constantly exposed to a plethora of ideas and concepts that may or may not help them in their lives.
In these times, be more vigilant in understanding which delivers the best outcomes.
True wisdom encompasses more than just intelligence; it’s an ability to understand which paths yield good and bad results.
With that said, be more observant.
Read multiple books and listen to various perspectives. Stay open to new experiences, but remember to critically evaluate what you encounter. Listen, not argue.
The greatest gift you can give yourself is the ability to discern between right and wrong paths and create steadfast morals where you won’t have to bend whenever society changes.
7. Initiate more movement
Two hours of free time is awesome. However, a study shows that when a person gets free time for more than five hours, his happiness actually starts to decline instead of bringing forth more happiness.
A-huh. More free time is NOT equal to more happiness.
Although I believe we can use free time to rejuvenate our minds, too much stagnation breeds anxiety and depression.
As human beings, we are inherently wired to be productive. To accomplish simple and complex things.
Through work, we get to have exercise, which is very detrimental to our health.
But more than that, when we take action, we have more chances to gather achievements and get things done, which results in satisfaction overall.
Some days are more fulfilling than others, but truly, knowing that we’ve made progress or accomplished something is another level of happiness.
Move more!
8. Know that you’re valuable
We might be guilty of self-pity and self-deprecation at times.
I sure did.
However, there’s one thing you need to hear.
You’re valuable.
Even if you don’t believe it, or despite people treating you badly, this significant truth remains.
As soon as you start to cherish and nurture yourself, your perspective on life becomes more resolute.
We recognize that external negativity does not dictate our worth; rather, we have an innate God-given value that no person can take away from us.
9. Reconnect, reconnect, reconnect
Life can be cruel sometimes, and we may have tendencies to withdraw and isolate.
However, once we heal ourselves and resolve the internal friction inside of us, it’s important to remember the value of maintaining connections with others and with nature.
We don’t have to convince ourselves that we can do everything alone or that we’re better off distancing from others. In truth, no one thrives in isolation.
Instead of withdrawing, try to walk in the park, join community programs, have coffee dates with friends, and have movie nights with the family.
When you’re kind to the people who know how to reciprocate your values and emotions, you’re also being kind to yourself.
Reconnect. Don’t isolate.
10. Be firm on your boundaries
I agree there are times when we let other people drag us around. We’re guilty of people-pleasing, and it’s taxing whenever we can’t satisfy people with their requests.
You might feel bad not joining their invitations. You may even sacrifice your time just to fulfill their wishes.
However, it’s imperative to also listen to our own needs and desires. Are we staying true to ourselves and pursuing what truly aligns with our values?
If you’re feeling the following signs, it may be time to reconsider your boundaries:
Do you feel:
- Overwhelmed?
- Resentful when people ask for our help?
- Burnt out?
- Like you’re unwillingly sacrificing time?
- Avoidant of interactions with others?
In these times, we must learn to be more straightforward. Emotions can often cloud our judgment and lead to unnecessary distress.
Look at the rational side of things. If your plate is already full, don’t hesitate to decline offers or invitations.
There’s no need to feel guilty about prioritizing rest over socializing on a Friday night, especially if you need time to recharge.
Be kind to yourself by having a steadfast guiding compass for your decisions. Base your choices on facts and what aligns with your well-being.
11. Invest in yourself
People would want to invest in real estate, in trading, or in businesses. But before all of that, the most important investment is IN YOURSELF.
It’s a no-brainer. Without growing in mind, wisdom, skill, and character, it would be difficult to succeed in the more technical endeavors in our lives.
Invest in good books to read. Invest your time in building fruitful habits and discipline. Put your efforts into practicing your chosen craft and accumulating valuable experience.
These are investments that can’t be taken away from you.
If you grow yourself, know that you’ll have something substantial to fall back on. You know you could always start again and build from scratch, drawing upon the skills and knowledge you’ve acquired along the way.
12. Take your rest
Even the strongest person in the world needs their rest, too.
What’s more, your efficiency increases when you allocate yourself time to rest.
You see, too much focus and information overload makes our engine (our brains) overload, which leads to heightened stress, burnout, and unproductivity.
That said, take a time off.
Personally, I advocate for strategic procrastination as a means of recharging our minds.
No, I’m not saying we should procrastinate all the time. Rather, chronic procrastination can be controlled once we allow ourselves to recharge our creative juices.
These are the 12 ways you can start compassion and being kind to yourself. I hope you gained some insights. Which ones would you start working on? Leave a comment below. 🙂
Thanks for reading!
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- 5 Steps to Overcome Disappointments in Life
- 5 Steps To Forgiving Someone (When It’s Too Difficult To Do It)
- 5 Life Tips To Become A Happier Person